Peter and Alan

Peter and Alan
...added Michael ...

about us...

A gay couple in the suburbs north of Denver, beginning the parenthood journey... good thing we have a long list of resources, physical and virtual, to help us through it!

10.22.2010

sigh

Such great plans, I had... and lately I can't find the time to mow the lawn and clean the carpets. I haven't posted pictures, since he's still in the county's custody, not ours...

Actually, I can't complain... life is going pretty well. The kid is crawling, climbing, chattering, growing, and thriving. He's finally bonding with us, finding as much comfort in our arms as he does with his blanket. We have our routines down, and the extended family loves him.

Then there's bio-mom. She's attempting to engage, but really only at the fun, easy stuff. She does her visitation weekly, and six months after they pulled the kid from her home, she finally registered for the nurturing parent group. She hasn't done any of her counseling, her domestic violence therapy, is still living with her aunt and dating the abusive bio-dad in violation of a restraining order. No job, the aunt's house in foreclosure, addicted to an abusive relationship... winning combination.

The kid gets night terrors after the weekly visitation sessions, and all we can do is hold him and hope that the magistrate moves toward termination of parental rights in November, rather than postponing the inevitable until February.

I was asked what had changed since the munchkin came into our lives. Hmm... so much, but maybe the most important is that I would stop a train to protect this kid... send prayers, thoughts, white light, whatever is going to work our way. I'm confident this will end properly, but I'd like a fast-forward button, please.

2 comments:

  1. My thoughts are with you both. In Wisconsin (Milw) we have been having a lot of discussions about how many chances does a bio parent get. And when does it no longer benifit the child. Especially in your situation...you are obviously the healthy choice for this baby.

    Prayers your way
    ciw

    ReplyDelete
  2. Are there laws that you can't photograph your Foster child? I did it straight from day one with our twins last year. No one said a thing. Not even the agencies and they read and commented on my Blog all of the time.
    Good luck. It doesn't sound like, according to you, that the Mother is working hard at all to get her child back so I do hope that he finds stability in your home.
    Good luck.
    Your Friend, m.

    ReplyDelete